Sometimes It’s Just Takes Imagination

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Cooking, Instagram

So I am searching for little things for the bedroom.  Ways to make it work with the color scheme and girlie things.  I found at JoAnn’s the other day a wooden mini dresser.  I got it for $6.50.  I already had the grey, white and yellow paint thanks to other projects I was working on.  So I got to work.  I painted it grey, with the drawers yellow and the little knobs white.  I’m going to wait til it dries and then put my jewelry in it and get my things out of the plastic box I have them in now.  I posted a pic of the finished product on my Instagram this morning.  So check it out.

If you don’t have my instagram, it’s belladonna115.

I think it will make a good addition to my bedroom.  Now on to something else I wanted to share.  Pure. Food. Yumminess.

1/2 jalapeno chopped and de-seeded
1/3 red onion
2 cloves of fresh garlic, chopped
cilanto
tomato-to your liking
salt, pepper to taste
1/4 avacado
1 bag brown rice
1 can of rinsed black beans
2 tbsp olive oil

In a skillet, saute the jalapeno, onion and garlic, add beans, cook over 
medium heat until done, cook rice per instructions.  Serve as follows:
Rice, bean mixture, season to taste, top with cilantro, tomato, avacado.

Pure. Food. Yumminess.

Sons of Anarchy

For the longest time, my habit when I worked on a blanket was whatever was on tv at mom and pappy’s, Harry Potter or The Unit.  But on my 2012 list I had put down I wanted to watch all seasons of Sons of Anarchy.  Why I don’t know.  I had resisted this show like the plague.  Who wants to watch a show about a Motorcycle gang?  But I started watching Justified.  And I’ve watched True Blood.  Compared to those, just how bad can this show be?

So I gave in a little.  I bought the first season and decided to give it a chance.  What could be the worst that could happen?  Well, let me tell you.

After the first episode, I was unsure.  I used to joke I wasn’t old enough to watch Justified.  Well, after the first episode of SoA, I figured I was plenty old enough to watch Justified if I could make it through this series.  But half way through Season 1 I was hooked.  This show is great.  Graphic at times, but great.  I already had favorites (Tara, Gemma, Opie, Chibs and of course Jax).  I’m now part of the way into Season 2 and it just seems to be getting better.  Did I mention Henry Rollins is in Season 2?  Yeah he’s a bad guy, but I got super excited to see him acting again.

Granted it’s tackling some tough issues.  And it’s not something kiddos need to watch, but for Adults, it’s pretty good.  At least in my opinion.  So much so that I’ll watch an episode or two even when I’m not quilting.

I’m thinking I like this idea of watching a tv series as I craft period.  And I like the idea of making a list of shows I want to see.  Supernatural and Big Bang Theory are right up there…

So suggestions anyone?

Grinding Axes

This is a mundane work vent but one I need to get off my chest.  Most of us at work have the same woe, but we can’t really say anything about it.  I just need to get it off my chest.  We have an employee who was hired just 30 days after me.  I used to think my annoyance was because I had only been here 30 days was still learning my job and yet they expected me to be able to teach her everything.  But after her training, they split us up.  One underwriter taking one assistant.

It worked for about 2 months.  But it got to be where there were a lot of mistakes on her part and the boss I guess just didn’t want to get rid of her.  So they shifted our job duties.  I took on quoting all the renewals and she was given the job of running loss runs, drivers, getting paper work and issuing all filings,binders and invoices.  Basically everything else.

It was fair because they also gave me ratings and new business quick quoting.  I have more than enough to keep me busy during the day.  But even giving her everything else wasn’t enough.  Since then, they have given her more work and yet I don’t think it’s enough sometimes.  And she can never make any decisions.  You see a level of insecurity in her work.  Everyone is constantly correcting her and no matter how many costly mistakes she makes the boss just shrugs it off.

Yes, it frustrates me.  Now I’ll be the first to say, I’ve made my share of mistakes too.  Yes, I get corrected on them.  Thankfully they aren’t nearly as often or as bad  as some she makes.  It’s the level of carelessness on her part that is frustrating me.  I just don’t understand it.  No matter how many times anyone corrects her she forgets it the next day.  And yet right now, I can just do my job, even though it takes longer than it should.  I am frustrated with it.

And we have an employee who was hired 30 days after this newbie.  She has over 35 years experience and ZERO confidence to make any decisions on her own.  I just don’t understand it.

Hard to believe I actually do like my job.  And really want to start more continuing ed to learn more about it.  This is a job that you have to know.  Insurance is not a job where you don’t have to think, you have to know coverages, know definitions…You have to have confidence in yourself and what you know.  Yes mistakes will be made, even by the ones who have been in it a long time.  But at the same time, you can’t just keep going on making mistakes and never learning from them.

I just don’t get it.

Shades of Imperfection

“Imperfection is beauty; madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.” Marilyn Monroe

I adore that quote.  It’s so true.  So with everything going on, this morning in the shower I started thinking.  I, like everyone else have imperfections.

• I’m quiet in a room of people I don’t know.  I’m just shy like that.  I have to know you to be able to warm up to you.
• I goof off sometimes at work, but don’t we all?
• There are mornings when I don’t make my bed.  *shhhh don’t tell Pappy*
• Yes I can be lazy at times and it seems to be a bit more lately about wanting to stay in bed and catch up on missing sleep than get up and go to the gym.  Or I can just put it off until the evening…
• Yes, I have had times lately where I have had a craving for some sort of meat and ate it.  Yet I felt terrible afterwards.
• I’m vain enough to want to tan, have nails because it makes me feel pretty.
• I’m not always the best daughter in the world, despite my best efforts.
• I’m not always the best friend in the world, despite my best efforts.
• My faith is a constant journey for me as is my spirituality.

I can go on for a while longer.  But then again, I can stop right there.  Because all of these imperfections make me who I am.  And while I struggle with all that I have, I also have to make myself stop.  Take a deep breath and realize that all of those shades make up me.  And I have some pretty amazing people in my life who accept me imperfections and all.

And that makes me happy.  So like I said yesterday, my goal is to stop with all the crap.  If people can love me for who I am, why can’t I do the same? Isn’t everything just another Shade of Imperfection that we are working on?

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To My Fellow Humans….

Let me just remind you.  The definition of bigotry is as follows:

“Stubborn & complete intolerance of any creed or belief or opinion that differs from one’s own”

Now read that again.  I’ve been on my soapbox about this before.  But it’s just something that get’s under my skin.  We are all God’s creatures great and small.  All of us.  And while we have so many factions that call each other wrong it’s getting a little over the top.  We can name call and boycott all day.  At the end of the day, all it’s going to do is piss off the other side more.  And things will escalate.  While we may not agree with other on one subject I don’t think what we are doing to each other right right.

It hurts to see everything going on today in this nation and think we’re supposed to be a free country.  With Justice and Liberty for all.  Are we really living by God’s law?  Didn’t he hand down a commandment “Love Thy Neighbor” ?  He didn’t take it back did he?  Did I miss that?  Didn’t he say Judge not Lest you be Judged?

If you don’t agree with someone’s views or beliefs, can’t you do it peacefully?  Don’t we realize we are creating more hate?  We’re supposed to be good and love everyone and yet we are doing the opposite.  We choose to judge instead of trying to love and leaving the rest like we are meant to, to God.

And yet we wonder why people are the way they are?  I think we need to take a long look at ourselves and what we are doing.  How we are treating people.  I know it won’t happen and one pebble won’t make a ripple, but frankly folks, I’m sick of this.  So let me opt out of all that crap now.

And let me say this I don’t care what they look like, who they love, what their religious views are or how rich or poor they are my friends are my family just as much as my blood and adopted relatives are.  They are all important to me.  If you can’t deal with that, tough.  You’re gonna miss out on something amazing.  Because I’m just that awesome and so is my family.

Things I Can’t Understand

• Why is it so important to headline that some actress had an affair with a director?  I know we’re all human and very imperfect, but shouldn’t some things be kept between people?  Yes if you’re an actress you are in the spotlight more, but please.  Not everything has to be made public!!!!  Somethings should stay private.
• Why is it that I typed the above and all my recommended tags went to the people in question?  THAT worries me a bit.
• Why can’t we focus on some feel good stories?
• Why can’t we be positive and uplifting to our fellow people?  Regardless of shape, height, color, gender, orientation or religion.  This goes for everyone!!!!
• Why can’t we have a four day work week?  I would happily work an extra 2 hours 4 days a week to have that.  Or at least give us half a day every other Friday.
• Why travel can’t be cheaper, we’re all doing it.  And if it were cheaper, wouldn’t you have more of  it?  Easier too.  I have people I miss and not enough money to go see them all.

*Insert Title Here*

I hate having to make some decisions.  They are big.fat.amazingly huge.PITAs.  And yet here I am.  Trying to make one.  And it’s been a hard one.  To let it go, or to just let it sit a little bit longer.  So I’m thinking I’m going to just let it sit.  Not do anything and let the ball stay in that person’s court until they deal with it.  After all, I’ve done my part.  Time and Again.  So now, to stick with it and see what happens.

I know this is vague but ultimately it’s been me and one other person and that’s it.  That’s why I’m leaving it like it is.  So all I can say is “It’s your turn”.  Let me see what you got.

Why Is It?

• I can sleep better in two hours on my parents couch than I do at night in my own bed?
• I can’t make up my mind now if I want to switch apartments.  Luckily I have a month to decide.
• I woke up in the usual form, usual sleep pattern for the day and was gung ho to clean until I started.
• I don’t want the weekend to end right now.  I just need a couple more days.
• I can’t figure you out?  (you know who you are.)
• Why, Why, Why?

It’s What You Make of It Really…

I didn’t have some of the greatest times starting out.  I can admit that.  I’ve seen and done a few things in my life.  And it’s taken A LOT to happen the past 10+ years for me to grow up.  I can admit that.  It’s all a part of figuring out who I am.

My latest round comes from a conversation with someone dear and a new bedding search.

When I moved into the first apartment after I got back, the first few days were overwhelming to say the least.  Trying to get everything organized, put up, getting what I needed.  Figuring out where I was.  Starting over.  Yikes it was hard.  I started working on the place, determined to make it mine.  But then I figured, since I was moving to the back apartment, I would wait.  Thinking I would be there for a bit, I put off getting anything else for the apartment.  But then the girls moved out and I wanted to get the upstairs apt.  So I put it off again.

And right now, it looks like they aren’t going to let me move.  It’s a suspicion that they don’t want to change out the carpeting that has been there for a while.  I was upset about it for a while.  But I’ve slowly gotten over that.  I pretty much decided that if that is the case, then I will stay where I am and wait and see how I feel about moving when the weather is not hot.  I’ll wait and figure it out as I get there.

But in the meantime, it takes it being pointed out by someone else how far I’ve come lately.  And this weekend even before the conversation, I started thinking. Why wait to get to that “perfect place” and decorate?  Yes, to me it was about moving stuff and not moving as much stuff, but it’s all the same in the end.

So this weekend, I searched and searched and thought about what I wanted to do.  And I decided to start working on the apartment, now.  The first room I wanted to start with was my bedroom.  I have to admit it was a little dark.  Maybe it was the state I felt I was in.  The black houndstooth, the dark purple.  It was a bit overwhelmingly dark.  I can admit that now.  So I’ve been thinking what colors would brighten it up and make it better?  I decided I wanted Grey, White, and Yellow.  Awesome colors.  So I searched and searched and revised it all on the fly.  And at the end of the day I had the start.

I have a new bedding set of a grey bedskirt, yellow and white striped sheets, a white comforter, white shams, a grey and white striped body pillow, yellow throw pillows and a beautiful white pillow with a grey bow.  I am trying to tie it in now with the existing black furniture and black curtains.  And I’m happy when I look at it.

I have a list planned out for each room.  I am going to finish the bedroom as much as I can (it’s too hot to redo the dresser right now.) before I move on to the next room.  It might take a while but I’m ok with it.  It’s progress.

Just like me.  So I’m realizing it’s really what you make of it.  And stop putting things off.

Thought for the Day…

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Mother Teresa

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.  Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.  Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.  Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.  Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten.  Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God.  It was never between you and them anyway.

-this version is credited to Mother Teresa