You can list all the cliches till you are blue in the face. But home is a word that I’ve sort of struggled with. To me home was always my own space and my own place. When I moved to California I had a hard time with it because I missed Louisiana. To me, it was home. But then I started to be okay with living there and it was home. When I moved back to Louisiana I struggled with it. I won’t lie. I missed Cali with a passion. I didn’t want to be here. At all.
But I promised that I would give it an honest try to find a job here so I could be closer to family. I have found a job that I otherwise wouldn’t have anywhere else and I took that as a sign. Granted I don’t like there isn’t all that much to do here but I’m still a close drive to a lot of things. So I decided to make the best of it and see where this path leads me. And I’m okay with it. I don’t feel like I am home yet, but then again, I don’t have my own place.
Last weekend I took the time off opportunity to go to Alabama where I was born and mostly raised. If you didn’t know, I was raised in a small town but moved to Tuscaloosa when I went to school. That was where I lived until I moved here. April 27th Tuscaloosa was devestated by a EF-5. And that was hard to be here and not be able to get there. I have many friends and family back there. So I waited until I had a lot time to go back.
I reconnected with some people who mean the world to me. Rach, Jenn and her family. I also got to spend time with Monica who I went to high school with. I had a great time, but it was sort of bittersweet. The devestation there is just heartbreaking. I didn’t get to Alberta City to see the damage there but I think that was a good thing. As I drove up McFarland on Wednesday evening I had to hold back the tears. Places I worked in College and places that were dear me to where gone. You could see the hospital far too early on McFarland.
The next night I went to see Rach and spend some time with her. I had to drive up 15th Street to get to her place and when she told me that she was only 3 blocks from the damage, she wasn’t kidding. I can’t imagine being there and my heart breaks. My first thought was to hug her and thank God she was ok. It could have been so much worse.
I had a hard time with seeing the damage and I couldn’t imagine being there. But I learned something else.
You can have roots and wings-despite what anyone says. My roots are in Bama. It will always be where I got my start. But even after everything, I realize something about Home.
It’s where you are. It’s you.